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👨‍👩‍👧 Family & People Cheat Sheet

Family vocabulary, the pronoun system, introducing your family, and Vietnamese cultural context.

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👨‍👩‍👧 Immediate Family
EnglishVietnamesePronunciationNote
Mother mẹ / má meh / mahmẹ = Northern · má = Southern
Father bố / ba boh / bahbố = Northern · ba = Southern
Parents bố mẹ
ba má
boh meh
bah mah
bố mẹ = Northern
ba má = Southern
Older sister chịcheeAlso used as "you" to older women
Older brother anhanhAlso used as "you" to older men
Younger sibling ememUsed for both younger brother and sister
Younger sister em gáiem gaigái = girl/female
Younger brother em traiem chaitrai = boy/male
Husband chồngchohng
Wife vợvuh
Child / children conkawn
Son con traikawn chai
Daughter con gáikawn gai
Extended Family
EnglishVietnamesePronunciationNote
GrandmotherbahAlso "you" to elderly women
Grandfather ôngohngAlso "you" to elderly men
Aunt (father's sister)kohAlso "you" to middle-aged women
Aunt (mother's sister)dee
Uncle (father's brother) chúchooAlso "you" to middle-aged men
Uncle (mother's brother) cậukoh
Niece / nephew cháuchow
Cousinanh/chị/em họanh/chee/em hawPrefix depends on age relative to you
Family gia đìnhyah ding
Relatives họ hànghaw hahng
💡 Vietnamese tracks family precisely. There are different words for maternal vs paternal aunts and uncles, and older vs younger siblings. Age order within the family is socially significant.
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🧠 The Pronoun System — The Key to Vietnamese
The big idea: Vietnamese doesn't have generic "I" and "you." Instead, you use family relationship terms that show your relative age and social standing.

When talking to someone older: call them anh/chị (older brother/sister) and refer to yourself as em
When talking to someone your age: use bạn for "you" and tôi for "I"
When talking to someone much older: use chú/cô (uncle/aunt age) or ông/bà (grandparent age)
The Pronoun Table
WordPronunciationMeansUse when...
tôitoyI / me (neutral)Safest default — works in most situations
ememI (younger/humble)Speaking UP to someone older than you
mìnhmingI (friendly/casual)With close friends your age
bạnbahnYou (friend)Someone roughly your age
anhanhYou (older male)Man older than you — waiter, colleague, stranger
chịcheeYou (older female)Woman older than you
chúchooYou (much older male)Man clearly your father's age
kohYou (much older female)Woman clearly your mother's age
ôngohngYou (elderly male)Very respectful — grandfather age
bahYou (elderly female)Very respectful — grandmother age
💡 As a foreigner: Using tôi / bạn is perfectly fine and respectful. Locals will be thrilled you're trying at all. The nuanced pronoun system is bonus knowledge — you don't need to master it to communicate effectively.
Pronoun in Action
Ordering at a restaurant (older male waiter)

Anh ơi, cho em...
"anh oy, chaw em" — Hey (older bro), please give me..."

Talking to a friend your age

Bạn khỏe không?
"bahn khway khome" — How are you?

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👋 Introducing Your Family
EnglishVietnamesePronunciation
This is my mother Đây là mẹ tôiday lah meh toy
This is my father Đây là bố tôiday lah boh toy
This is my husband Đây là chồng tôiday lah chohng toy
This is my wife Đây là vợ tôiday lah vuh toy
My family has 4 people Gia đình tôi có bốn ngườiyah ding toy kaw bone nguh-ee
I have two siblingsTôi có hai anh chị emtoy kaw hi anh chee em
I'm an only child Tôi là con mộttoy lah kawn moht
I'm the oldest Tôi là con cảtoy lah kawn kah
I'm the youngest Tôi là con úttoy lah kawn oot
I'm the middle child Tôi là con giữatoy lah kawn yuh-ah
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💑 Relationships & Status
EnglishVietnamesePronunciation
Boyfriend bạn traibahn chai
Girlfriend bạn gáibahn gai
Are you married? Bạn có gia đình chưa?bahn kaw yah ding chuh-ah
I'm married Tôi đã kết hôn rồitoy dah ket hohn roy
I'm single Tôi còn độc thântoy kawn dawk thun
I'm divorced Tôi đã ly hôntoy dah lee hohn
Do you have children? Bạn có con chưa?bahn kaw kawn chuh-ah
I have one child Tôi có một đứa contoy kaw moht duh-ah kawn
How old is your child?Con bạn mấy tuổi?kawn bahn may too-oy
💡 Vietnamese people ask directly about marriage and children — it's friendly curiosity and a normal conversation opener, not intrusive. Answering openly (or with humor) is warmly received.
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🎊 Cultural Events & Celebrations
EnglishVietnamesePronunciationNote
Lunar New Year TếttetMost important holiday — families reunite
Happy New Year! Chúc mừng năm mới!chook mung num muh-ee
Wedding đám cướidahm kyuh-eeOften very large — hundreds of guests
Death anniversary / memorialgiỗyohObserved annually for deceased family members
Birthday sinh nhậtsing nyut
Happy birthday! Chúc mừng sinh nhật!chook mung sing nyut
Congratulations! Chúc mừng!chook mungWorks for any happy occasion
Ancestorstổ tiêntoh tyenAncestor worship is deeply embedded in culture
💡 Tết is everything. Vietnamese New Year (Lunar calendar — usually late January or February) is the single most important cultural event. Families travel from across the country to be together. If you're in Vietnam during Tết, expect businesses to close for up to a week.
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